Dammit! Fooled again!
That was my first thought this morning after a lovely, small, mortar and pestle was scooped up from under my nose this morning at a garage sale. And doesn’t it figure, this isn’t just any garage sale; it was a downsizing sale that a couple I adore were having in preparation for the next stage of their life. Anyway, I came upon this lovely pottery mortar and pestle, took it from it’s shelf and carried it for nearly 30 minutes as I continued to browse.
In a fateful lapse of awareness, I set my treasure down, along with 2 other items, in order to free my hands to rummage through some books. I wasn’t paying attention as the lady next to me tried on a few hats and made small chit-chat with me. She went on her way and I finished my search through the books. I gathered the 2 items and reached for the mortar and pestle. It wasn’t there! I looked all around, even in the book boxes – knowing full well I didn’t put it in there! Small panic set in. And then I saw it – being wrapped up and bagged for the woman who was at the table with me.
Dammit! Fooled Again! Turned into “shame on me!” That turned into righteous indignation that someone could be so …. hmmmmm … what’s the word … sneaky? Opportunistic? Shady? …. MEAN! Or maybe she was unconscious too and truly thought someone just left it there. I doubt that, but it could be possible. IF that were the case, why wouldn’t she ask me if I was planning on purchasing that? Anyway … I’m still … obviously … a little agitated over the whole scenario. I don’t know if I’m more upset by my unawareness of my surroundings, or at my continued lack of speaking up.
Perhaps the upset is disappointment over realizing, once again, that there are still some people out there who just don’t care about anyone but themselves. It’s so rare that I run into people like this in my life that it really is shocking to me when it does happen. More accurately, I’m better able to recognize people who are like that and adjust my course accordingly. Today, I was blindsided. I know that there is a gift in this, a gift greater than the mortar and pestle would have been.
There is always a gift in adversity. Sometimes you just have to trust … and look really hard.
I’m sure by now that you know that this story really isn’t about a mortar and pestle, it’s about trust. This story is simply a reminder that not everyone is considerate, not everyone is conscious. Heck, even I wasn’t conscious! This is a story about trusting that there is a gift, even in disappointing situations. This story is a reminder to speak up if I really desire something, that sometimes even “stuff” can be the object of that desire. I do let some things go too easily for the sake of ease.
Sometimes letting things slide really is for the best and sometimes “it’s not big deal” is a lie.
I still have to learn to discern which is called for with a little more speed. Can instinct (or knowing) be accelerated? I truly hope so; I’m growing tired of discovering that something is important to me long after the moment of choice has passed.
I don’t have any wise words of wisdom for you in this post. It seems I am simply documenting my own little blip of humanity as a reminder that I still have much to learn … about (and for) myself.